All real estate agents have at least minor gripes with the towns where they work. Maybe inventory is too heavy, or maybe property taxes are through the roof. But we’d gladly take a listing in even a middling neighborhood in Knoxville over some of the cities that populate our favorite TV shows, books and movies. Seriously… YOU try selling a house where Freddy Krueger could pull you through the bed at any moment.
7. Derry, Maine (the novels of Stephen King)
The scene for some of Stephen King’s most terrifying visions (most notably It, Insomnia, Bag of Bones, and the first act of 11/22/63), Derry doesn’t come across as particularly lovely even on the surface. Add in a killer demon-clown and a recurring history of missing children, and you’re going to have a problem attracting young families to your open house.
6. Springwood, Ohio (A nightmare on Elm Street)
Okay, so maaaaaybe your sellers and their friends didn’t burn a dude alive. And maaaaaybe he hasn’t come back to haunt the dreams of your sellers’ children. But do you really want to take that chance? Besides, no one has ever made their money back from adding on a boiler room, anyway.
5. Metropolis (Superman)
The skyline is stunning and the local fishwrap is second to none, but even if you could afford a penthouse with a killer sunset view, would you really want to take the chance that General Zod or Doomsday might get tossed through your living room at any given moment? Sure, Superman is (usually) around to protect you, but the insurance expense alone might be a deal breaker for even the most Lex Luthor-like of supervillains.
4. Springfield, USA (The Simpsons)
At first you may wonder who wouldn’t want to sell a home in the land of Moe’s Tavern, Duff Beer and the Springfield Isotopes? But look closer. That nuclear power plant can’t be good for resale, the only guy weirder than the mayor is the elementary school principal, and there only appears to be one church. Not to mention the fact that taking 25 years to decide what state you’re even living in. Makes back taxes a pain.
3. South Park, Co (South Park)
Do we even need to go into detail on this one? Giant killer guinea pigs. Mecha-Streisand. Portals to hell. And that’s just the stuff that we can mention in a family environment. Besides, all the houses look the same, so there goes curb appeal.
2. Woodbury (The Walking Dead)
Sure, the bucolic southern ‘burg (which is actually the fully functional small town of Senoia, Ga., in real life) often looked safe and quaint during seasons three and four of The Walking Dead. But something tells us even a nice home would be hard to sell in a town run by patch-eyed despot with a zombie problem. And that’s before the lovesick guy from Love Actually showed up with guns.
1. Owl, North Dakota (Chuck Klosterman’s quick-read 2008 novel Downtown Owl)
comes off as a comedy at first, but it’s got a dark side. The inhabitants of Owl are depressed, lonely, borderline alcoholic and isolated (the town doesn’t even get cable), and that’s BEFORE a freak northern deep-freeze turns the tiny city into a literal icebox. Have a listing? Double down on the insulation and encourage the snowbirds to winter in the south.