Article: Best of 3 Sentence Sell

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Since last fall, we’ve been (more Fridays than not) asking our Facebook followers to have a little fun with us with a series called the “3 Sentence Sell.”

The concept is simple: We post a photo of a home of, um … questionable? … design or upkeep and ask our savvy community of nearly 6,000 real estate agents to pitch that property in three sentences or less. The results are fun and, often, hilarious.

Below are a bunch of responses, which we very much enjoyed reading as they came in. Answers that that particularly made us laugh – or, better yet, actually take a second look at the property – are bolded.

Thank you for participating! Look for the return of the 3 Sentence Sell next Friday! In the meantime, follow us on Facebook at if you don’t already.

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“Enjoy the beautiful water view from this enchanting cottage with old world charm. Perfect sportsman paradise. Grab your waders, fly rod, and enjoy.”
– Havey Fry

“Beautiful shack for sale. Could use as a getaway place. Men this could be a man cave and it’s reasonable, bad credit, no credit, just pay however you can, just pay!”
– Mary Esther Dehoyos

“Small, affordable, adaptable, easy maintenance, light work, perfect for that perfect person! Any budget will survive! It is what you make it!”
– Tony Bologna

“Old shack home for sale as is on the water. $100.00 cash or check with id, and no credit needed. No application fee.”
– Cassandra Beard

“A one of a kind cozy ocean side eclectic cottage with tons of “old world” charm…….one sentence sold.”
– Robert Urbanski

“Awesome unique one of a kind cottage…your very own getaway….beachfront with amazing views for your very own private relaxation…let me give you a tour!”
– Sareet Frazier

“It’s a roof over ur Head”
– Doris Jones

“Welcome deer hunters.”
– Dawn Englehart

“Great view. No commute. Fixer.”
– Linda Altamirano

“Enjoy life….live free… bills.”
– Farzana Mirza

“Step right up, hurry , hurry before the bid begins !! Cozy, comfortable , honeymoon ready.”
– Norie Lockemy Watkins

“1)Your wife isn’t here.
2)Your kids are far, far away.
3)The fridge is full of beer.”
– Joyce Williams


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“It’s yours free!” – Jessie Brock

“Bronco fan’s dream. Live in fandom heaven. All one could want for the discerning Mile High resident.” – Janice A. Hulsey Barnes

“House has good bones. You’re buying the least per square foot in the most desired neighborhood. Paint is cheap.” – Kelley Mulick

“60’s post modern charm. NY world’s Fair colors! Distinct quarters for a discerning resident!” – Matt Russo

“Paint this house.” – Kathy Varnell

“Syracuse fan only.” – Stephanie Gonzalez


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“Diamond in the rough, good fixer upper. Buy low, sell high. Get it now!!!!”
– Kim Rowan

“Diamond in the rough. Grab your hammer and paint brush and turn this into a sparkling jewel. Terms negotiable.” – Havey Fry

“Bay Area investor’s dream! Needs TLC, a diamond in the rough. Call AgentQ to tour.” – Quintella M. Griffin

“Cheap. There. Previously owned by Batman Superman and Jesus.”
– Jason Wilkens

“How about three words…lot for sale!!!” – Joe Gutierrez

“Affordable Fixer upper.” – Brian Tucker

“40 – 60% yearly ROI.” – Isaiah Lee

“Bando for the low low, move your bricks in and out like a production line, act now and get a free security system upgrade!” – Ryan Curtis


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“Paint. Paint. PAINT!” – Ross M. Brown


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“This home has a designer presence. This home offers many design opportunities. Upgraded landscaping underway.” – Stacy Lynne Conley

“One of a kind statement design of luxury just wait till you see the inside!”
– Maria Borrego